Even with all the pep talks I've gotten about school -- how I'm taking hits early to someday get paid much more than everyone else I see around me, how I'm growing up faster than most, how I'm stronger than most because school's left a bad taste in everyone's mouth -- I still can't get a grab on life, school, work, etc. I just keep slipping. I feel so anxious. Sometimes I just get so scared of everything around me that I want to curl up in a ball and just lay in a corner. Watching other students who seem happy, but may be going through the same pain as me, they hide it really well. I really don't know.
I've missed several classes due to tardiness and failure to even show up to class due to the embarrassment of walking in late, or just failure to make it at all. My sisters illness, my own illness. So many factors get in the way especially when you're constantly having to drive home, school, errands.. There's not enough time in the day. There really isn't. It freaks me out.
There's 4 more weeks of school left.
What do you do when you just can't hide anymore?
What do you do when your parents aren't home -- you don't have the support you need.
You have no more money, and you're only making enough to get to school daily.
I could say I'm being a big baby, but I'm not whining about it. I just don't know what to do. I feel so lost and disappointed in myself, but what if you just can't help the occurrences that happen in your life?
Everything seemed so out of my control, so how do I control it?
I'm so lost.
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