juicy justine

Hello again to all my friends and to you strangers who I share bits and pieces of my life with -- who are truly interested, and who connect with my thoughts, ideas, and lively rants. I know it's been a while since I've last written about anything, but with all the crossroads, and major transitions in my life I think it would be a wise choice to begin writing again for the sake of sanity: organizing the "mess" I call life -- making written commitments to myself so that I can explore all the feelings and experiences and just what it is I'm really thinking at the time I'm thinking those exact things. I'm not going to lie, my life is so overwhelming right now, so overpowering, it's almost so hard for me to grasp and I find myself getting anxiety attacks from time to time. This shouldn't be happening. I need to take more control over my life. I should be more proactive about my life, keep moving, and always try to stay one step ahead of the game. It's a shame I don't have much time to tell more about what's going on at this very moment, but just you wait and see what I've got to tell you. You won't be disappointed in such a JUICY story.

SNORLAX

It's been a while since I wrote anything or even jotted any thoughts down on paper for that matter. I don't even think I think about much anymore. What I mean is I feel as though I wake up in the morning to look forward to SO MUCH: video games for about an hour, work, and video games again (if it's not beer pong or dinner with a friend). Sure it sounds like the life doesn't it? Don't get me wrong, it's fun. It really is. But for how much longer?

Did I go to school to acquire these nasty loans just to sit around and watch it devour me? HA. I'm being over dramatic. I used to really be that way..

Honestly, I used to want more, and I still do to some extent, but I'm living "okay" -- that's what I have to remember. I always wanted more out of life too soon. I always complained that I couldn't squeeze every drop out of the wring of life because I knew it was still soaking wet from the falls I'd taken. But all that.. it gets you too worked up about nothing. It gets you miserable, negative, unhappy.

Life could be 10xs worse or something, and I'm happy with what I have. I just need to remind myself that I could push push push! And as long as I am happy with the consequences of my choices -- good or bad -- I can live with the decisions I've made.

Bring it.

I returned home from Las Vegas just last night, and I have to say "Bravo" for an amazing trip. Usually my trips to Vegas include bickering family members, drama fo' yo mama type people, straight up unhappy people. I won't name names, but sometimes we have a Chihuahua (Chi-wah-wah) :'( on the trip if you know what I mean.. Not this time! I managed to stay within a budget, only lose 9 dollars, have a 2010 new years kiss, and stay with happy people.

I'm sure you've heard it all -- resolutions, hopes, wishes for 2010.. Dreams, aspirations, you name it. I say f*ck those expectations, and a "great for you, if you can live up to them" to the people who will, but I'm going into a "new" year with the intent and willingness to learn and grow from the experiences I will foresee rather than b*tching about how last year sucked, and this year will be better. It never ends. The way I see it, it's another day -- granted it's a brand new one, but those who expect to reset their lives are looking for trouble... Let's just enter 2010 with a brighter perception, more positivity, the intent to work hard and prosper..

As for 2009, I'd like to say THANK YOU for teaching me well; for challenging me; for making me stronger. No matter what people say, you were not a bad year at all. I loved the year 2009: I may have lost a car, almost lost my house twice, been hit with identity theft by a family member, filed for bankruptcy, broke up with the guy I thought I'd one day marry, and yet I'm not bummed. On the flip side, I truly appreciate it all. I appreciate all the things I have today, what I've done to push through such a challenging year; quite frankly, I am flattered that you chose me to toughen up.

So 2010, why don't you bring it.

I love my life.
I am truly happy.

Merry Birthday

In about an hour I turn 23. It's exciting and boring at the same time. This is the first birthday I have spent alone for the last 4 years &I mean completely alone sitting here in my room in total quiet with not a soul at all -- I am not connected with anyone; I am here, and I'm pretty happy. I want to cuddle!

Simple gifts

It's not too late to get me a few things. Gift cards are great for me because I like to buy small things that add up rather than one big thing. I can do a Blick's Art gift card, windsor and newton 16x20 canvas, a pair of toms from val surf. I don't know, surprise me.

I want to paint <3


I recently found a painting done of me in 2005-06 by a friend.

Free.99

For the past few weeks, a few of my friends and I have tried to spend our weekends doing exciting things that are cheap. Of course this ends up with THE quick fix: booze, booze, booze.. In the kind of economy we're in, ideally, it'd be great to have a "money-free" weekend doing things that are simple, enjoyable and FREE without losing your personality!

Anyway, I found a website called The Simple Dollar: Financial Talk for the Rest of Us. Here, a husband has compiled a collection of one hundred fun ways to spend your weekends "money-free." Granted, some of the items on the list are a bit.. well, you just may lose your personality from doing THESE things, but the list definitely keeps it fresh for you and your friends and keeps your brain thinking!

100 Things to do During a Money Free Weekend
Take a look, and let me know what you think, what you like, and if you have other suggestions! I'd appreciate it!

*Sigh* (:
It's always nice to work on DIY projects. I miss it! Let's work on some!